Psycle

Have you ever seen this movie? The Intouchables? It's a 2011 French movie, which in case you haven't, you must desperately watch. It's one of my favorite movies and also, one I think I should watch at least once per year.

The movie is about a very rich man, Philippe, who is paralysed from the neck down after a paragliding accident. He's now in the search of a caregiver (after having fired lots of them) and he makes an excellent, yet weird choice, by hiring Driss. Driss is out on parole for robbery, and generally comes from another "planet" (in comparison to Philippe and his staff and friends). The movie walks us through their relationship and its ups and downs.

Critic Roger Ebert writes:

"The Intouchables" has an element of truth that it never quite recognizes. The role of a good caregiver is hardly limited to lifting, bathing, grooming, dressing, pushing and supplying medicines. The patient is faced with a reality he finds difficult to accept: he has been deprived of all he once took for granted, such as the simple ability to walk across a room. A caregiver can't provide that, but he can provide something more valuable, companionship.

This is a great parallel for the role of a "good therapist", too. And even though we can’t offer companionship as such, all of the above works perfectly for our role, too. A good therapist, in my humble opinion, should of course address the obvious difficulties the client faces, but should also get beyond those. A person is still a person, disability or not. And sometimes, we seem to forget the person and try to connect with the problem, the symptom, the pathology or so. We don't always mean bad, sometimes we're just afraid of how we should be with that other person, but I think it's imperative that we do not forget we're both humans. This movie is an ode to humanity as I see it and a "how-to" encounter another with dignity. Maybe Driss gets a little too far sometimes, but I think we have a great opportunity to learn so much from him, as therapists and humans, nonetheless.

I read an article some time ago, written by John Sterns. He says he is diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder (a co-diagnosis of schizophrenia and bipolar disorder), chronic depression and chronic anxiety. Too many labels one might say but what do they all mean? How does he experience his living?

For one thing, being crazy is noisy, he says. He hears voices, telling him unpleasant things and his own self is now his enemy. This particular phrase resonates with me. My whole life I’ve been thinking how instead of loving myself I keep beating me up whenever I don’t do what would be best for me, or whenever I have the same problem over and over again. I have previously mentioned how much I dislike bugs and viruses and that kind of stuff. Well, except for fighting with them I have myself to fight against to now too. This constant “you shouldn’t be that way” thing, that gets in our minds for one reason or another.

Anyway, to go back to John Sterns, he continues his article with a story concerning art therapy as a form of therapy used in the hospital he was staying in a time of crisis. He didn’t feel like expressing himself through art but the social worker was very clear as to how important it was to see signs of his recovery through his art. So he started making art. A lot. And with some smart moves he made them believe he was now better. But actually he wasn’t. He was just sad.

This makes me seriously wonder about the methods we use as mental health professionals to help those people in need. Are we really trying as much as we should? Shouldn’t we examine every person’s needs and treat her/him accordingly? We seem to give a great value to art therapy for example (and other things too) to see the wanted progress but what if this person doesn’t care for art? What if art makes her/him feeling worse? Why do we insist on what we think it’s better for her/him? Shouldn’t we keep an open ear to different kinds of expression? And on the other hand, how much space is there really to act like that, on your own beliefs, in hospitals, where there’s a very specific protocol to be followed?

Let me know your thoughts, or your own personal experiences.

John Stern’s article is very well articulated and you can (and totally recommend you to) read it here.

image: Hallucination bridge by MoreThanNothing

Last Wednesday Simon Critchley (the well known British philosopher) was invited by Onassis Cultural Centre (http://www.sgt.gr/en/programme/event/1000) to have a conversation with Kostas Yemenetzis (a Greek psychoanalyst) about emotions in a time of uncertainty. Uncertainty is a mild way to express what currently takes place here in Greece, let me assure you. Anyway, it was a nice conversation between them, which of course I’m in no place to reproduce, but I thought I could share the two or three things that made an impression upon me.

One of them was something Simon Critchley said about emotions in general, how an emotion is not something you feel inside you, it’s not a separate entity or something but rather something that’s out there, something taking place in-between you and the other person. It’s something that is co-created. This is very interesting for me, I guess I have never thought it that way. Of course I always considered emotions as something dynamic, which has a lot to do with the other person, but there are some emotions that have nothing to do with other people. Or maybe... not?

He also said that language comes before emotions and not the other way around. Ok, this one I can’t exactly remember if he was sure about or just wondering which comes first, the language or the feeling. At first I thought that’s just not possible, I always have a feeling and then I get to express it. And it was at that exact moment where it became obvious to me that I can never express a feeling that stays there unchangeable and static. It always changes forms while interacting with the other and of course who that other one is, plays a very big role into what the feeling will be later and what I’m going to say later etc. I guess this is very close to what they both talked about when they said that the word emotion has in it this very motion, it’s not static at all. I wonder if this could be the distinction between feelings and emotions or what is the general difference between them for that matter.

I’m going to end with what Yemenetzis said at the beginning, that uncertainty is what brings emotions, you don’t get many emotions while being absolutely certain. I guess he’s right, this is somehow what a lot of people say when they’re bored, that everything is somewhat flat, they want something to happen, they want a change. While I totally relate to that I cannot not wonder how can we ever be certain? Life is an act of uncertainty as I see it. You can be more confident for some things than for some others, sure, but certain? What is ever certain? I mean, except death. And on that happy note I’m leaving you, I know you didn’t quite expect it but I’d like to create that feeling of uncertainty I was talking about :p. Let me know what you think!

A book I'd like to read as soon as possible!

"When you don't exist is Amnesty International's campaign for the human rights of migrants, refugees and asylum-seekers in Europe and at its borders.

People move to Europe for different reasons. Some flee persecution or war. Others leave because of chronic poverty. They hope to find a safer, better future in Europe. But too often they find a different reality.

Europe is failing migrants, refugees and asylum-seekers. Negative attitudes to asylum-seekers and migrants are widespread. European countries are stepping up measures to control migration. This can cause serious human rights violations. People on the move have their rights violated, often out of the public eye. They are effectively made invisible."

(text from Amnesty International's youtube channel)

What if we were them? What if tomorrow morning we had to walk till we get to India, instead of just be stuck in traffic? With the current situation in Greece maybe that kind of reality isn't far off. Exaggeration? Or just the near future?

Anyhow, the video below is heartbreaking, really worth watching. Brings me tears every single time.

I recently had to write a paper about one of Heidegger’s concepts- whichever I would like. I chose to occupy myself with being-towards-death. Simon Critchley says (http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/belief/2009/jul/13/heidegger-being-time?intcmp=239) that the basic concept behind the most famous of Heidegger’s works, Being and Time, is simply that

Being is time. Time is limited and so are our lives.

With death, Being reaches its end. Death throws us out of our relationship with the world as we know it.

Nobody can die my own death, nor can I have any death experience besides my own. Death is somewhat my own, it’s mine and mine only. Death is exactly what limits my future possibility,

it’s the possibility of the impossibility, as Heidegger used to say. We are always towards-death and maybe this is what makes the world go round, maybe that’s what gives us any motive to live whatsoever.

In the everydayness we tend to forget all these things, we tend to get lost inside other people and how they live their lives, we tend to live inauthentically. Death gives us an opportunity to jump out of this crazy roller coaster and turn to ourselves and finally ask: is this how I want to live my life? Is this what I want to make of it? So, some kind of freedom is being born. The freedom of choosing a life -my life- and apparently the responsibility that goes along with it.

Death is actually a process of which everything but the last part, belongs to life. I am towards-death and that brings me face to face with my finitude, but with my life too.

We don’t usually talk about death in our everyday lives for some reason. It’s like this bad thing that won’t happen, unless you talk about it. It’s like a common secret, everyone remembers about it but no one particularly wants to bring it to the table. It’s a normal defense mechanism, we have a lot of them us human beings, but with this one I’d advise you to be a bit more careful. Don’t close the door at it, don’t make it an “it”! It’s your life we’re talking about, and we live dyingly - it’s a fact. Maybe by coming to terms with it you’ll live more... fully. With more awareness. Or maybe you’re gonna get depressive, or maybe even both (as happened in my case :) ) Defense mechanisms may be soothing, but they also seriously limit our possibilities.

Meanwhile, no matter how hard we try there is always a specific number of possibilities we can fulfill in life. As long as I live I choose and I cannot choose everything. If, however, I don’t choose, maybe others will do it for me!

Anyway, we should look at death, not for too long though, not anyone can stare directly at either death or the sun, as La Rochefoucauld said once. How easy is it though to accept that we live dyingly? How easy is it to go with the flow of things and their ephemeral nature? How could we manage pain but living passionately at the same time?

Well, to be honest I have no idea. I find myself in great terror in terms of death. I’m just trying to live more fully, more “personally”, being closer to myself and my personal values that is, finding myself always here, but also always in relation to this unbearable towards-death, which actually is embodied in me, whether I like it or not.

by theflickerees